My former boss and youth pastor use to (and perhaps still does) tell the youth that they needed to come to church with an expectation to hear from God. That we would hear more from God when we came with eager expectation to hear from Him.I began thinking about this, this Sunday while preparing to go to church. Perhaps the reason I've been getting very little out of church lately is because I'm attending with the expectation to get very little out of church lately.
So this week I went with a band new attitude, visiting a church I haven't been to in awhile (church number... 1? Maybe?). I "put on my happy face", prayed that God would speak to me through this service and came with a heart full of expectation to hear from God.
I'd like to tell you this worked like a magic charm. That I felt God in a powerful way, that I left with new purpose and direction, that God spoke to me distinctly. I'd like to tell you that, but I can't.
I will say that I was more focused and "tuned-in" than I have been for awhile. I was less critical and even asked God to help me curb my sarcastic thoughts (which often run rampant). I did get more from the service than I have recently.
I believe God did hear my prayer and see that I sincerely wanted to hear from Him. But I didn't feel the heavens part or anything.
Maybe you are thinking that is because that "heaven parting" occasion doesn't actually happen. If you thought that, you'd be wrong. I've known those times. Sometimes they are full of emotion and I've ended up literally on my face before God. Sometimes they are crystal clear, a still small voice and I know exactly what God is telling me. It does happen. It didn't this Sunday.
This doesn't mean I didn't learn anything. The pastor spoke of us praying for miracles, but what we really wanted was magic. That "boom" God fixes everything. And that yes, God can do that, but He more often chooses to use us in His miracles. His passage was John 6:1-14 where God uses a small boy's bread and fish to feed thousands. Jesus knew what he was going to do to meet the need of these hungry people, but asked the disciples, "Where are we to buy bread, so that these people may eat?"
God wants to use us. We need to be usable. God wants to speak to us. We need to be ready to hear.
To me coming with the expectation to hear from God is a really good thing, but it isn't always enough. It is kinda of like going to take a test having just glanced over the material and asking God to bring to mind what you have learned. Or like a non-athletic person going into a baseball game with a focused and determined attitude, but no practice time. (and yes, I've done both). Your focused-ness may help some, but it doesn't make you a science expert or a baseball pro.
God is not going to withhold Himself from us because of anything we have or have not done. There is no ritual to perform or list of "to do"s to hear from God. He isn't like a human, thank goodness.
However, I do think there are times we keep ourselves from hearing Him.
Am I only trying to hear God on Sunday morning, without seeking Him all week long? Am I expecting diamonds of wisdom from the pastor, but not delving into God's word for myself? Am I expecting church to fix all my problems, without dealing with unforgiveness in my life? These are just my examples... they may be different for other people.
In this blog I've been putting a lot of pressure on the church to step up and be what God has called it to be! I still think that is valid. But I can't make the church as a whole change, even if it needs too. All I can do it try to peruse God with an unwavering passion of my own. To seek Him in all aspects of my life, not just in what church to go to.
In the words of Brother Lawrence's book The Practice of the Presence of God:
"It is not necessary for being with God to be always at church; we may make an oratory of our heart, wherein to retire from time to time, to converse with Him in meekness, humility, and love. Every one is capable of such familiar conversation with God..."
