Church & Guilt

"There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. For the law of the Spirit of life has set you free in Christ Jesus from the law of sin and death. For God has done what the law, weakened by the flesh,could not do.By sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh and for sin,he condemned sin in the flesh, in order that the righteous requirement of the law might be fulfilled in us, who walk not according to the flesh but according to the Spirit." Romans 8:1-4

As you may or may not know I haven't really been going to church recently. *Gasp!* Yes, yes I know, let's get the shock and doubting of my Christianity out of the way. Got it out of your system? Good.

I have to tell you though, these past few weeks of not attending church have been very interesting and, I think, good for me. You know how sometimes you don't miss something until it is gone? Or maybe you don't even realize you had something until it is gone? Well that is what has happened to me in these church-less weeks... kind of. No, I haven't realized how much I love and miss church, that isn't what I've noticed is gone from my life. What is gone then, you ask? I'll tell you. The church guilt! And no, I don't miss it.

This post is going to make some people mad, I'm very sorry about that. You can always stop reading now.

In the past month or so of not attending any church anywhere I have realized that I'm... happy! I do miss many of the people I use to go to church with, but I don't miss the feeling of guilt that often comes with a Sunday morning service.

The alter call that is meant to be a time between you and God that is actually a call for you to review how you've messed up in life. I don't miss it. The sermons about how sin keeps God from fellowshipping with you (when actually it is you who keeps you from God not Him or your sin). I don't miss it. The flowery prayers that are meant more for the people hearing them than for the God we are praying too. I don't miss it.

I don't miss feeling like I have to shape up or ship out. I don't miss the manipulative calls to serve God in your home church (despite the fact that you may be serving Him elsewhere and in your own way). I don't miss the talk about how you need give your tithes so God will bless you. I don't miss people speaking in "church speak" so they sound more spiritual. I don't miss the "shoulds". "I should do this." "We should do that." "I know I should be acting this way." I just don't miss it!

What do I miss? I miss the friends at had at my church that I don't see as much anymore. I miss them because I've realized the relationships I had with them is what church is meant to be. Iron sharpening iron without any of the guilt and shame.

I'm not saying to you shouldn't repent (agree with God about) your sin. I'm not saying that, I'm saying that feeling like you are a bad Christian or not a good enough... whatever, isn't how a redeemed and born again child of God should feel! And I for one don't miss feeling that way.

You know what I love? I love the prayer times we have at my work each Monday. Prayer and God's word without the traditions of men. I love talking to my close friends about what God is doing in their lives and how He is stretching them. I love the random phone calls I get from people who want to pray about something with me. You know what I love? I love the body of Christ, while I don't miss "the church" at all. When did these things become separate?

Is going to church on Sundays a bad thing? No, not always. But is it what Christ meant for His body? No, not always. It is one way we gather as the body of Christ. And it is only a good thing if we do it in a way that lines up with scripture. I still want that, I know some people have found it. But mostly I want to live in the freedom we have in Christ.

"For freedom Christ has set us free; stand firm therefore, and do not submit again to a yoke of slavery." Galatians 5:1

A Side Note: Red Light Green Light

Sometimes churches remind me a a game of "Red Light, Green Light". Did you ever play that game as a child... or maybe as a grown up? It is far superior to the somewhat inane "Duck, duck goose", the relatively violent "Red Rover", or the ambiguous rules of "Mother May I?" Though I could probably use them as comparisons to the church as well, I'll stick with "Red Light, Green Light".

I feel like the modern day church and the modern day Christian has made Christianity all about a list of dos and don'ts. You can do this. Green light. You can't do that. Red light. You can only do this when no one is watching. Green light. Red light. Sure you can do that, but you'll be a "stumbling block". Yellow light?

And these supposed rules are so arbitrary. Different rules in different churches. Different rules in different parts of the country. Different rules for staff than for lay people! Red light. Green light. Red light. Green light. Ever feel like you can't get anywhere?

Or what about the "Red light. Green light" rule that says if you move even a faction of an inch during "Red light" you have to start over? Don't we do that to people? "Oh I'm sorry you didn't meet my expectations, you're human. Please remove yourself from this ministry until you are right with God."

Before Christ's death and resurrection our relationship with God may have been based on law, but even then the Pharisees took it too far. They were the rule-makers of the time and Jesus warned against them.

"How is it you don’t understand that I was not talking to you about bread? But be on your guard against the yeast of the Pharisees and Sadducees.' Then they understood that he was not telling them to guard against the yeast used in bread, but against the teaching of the Pharisees and Sadducees." Matthew 16:11,12

Yeast is something that spreads and gets bigger. Once you let this philosophy into your churches and into your lives it grows. And no, I'm not just talking about what people consider fundamental or conservative churches. Even the "cool, hip" churches struggle with this obstinate behavior. Signing contracts to be on ministry teams, giving youth regulations on how close they can sit next to the opposite sex, how much (if any) acholohl can you drink, what style music do we use, ect...

If we are ruled by regulations that are set down for us by other humans what is going to happen to us in situations where we have to make choices on our own? Either we are going to be so bound by rules we can't move. Red light!! Or we are going to say "The heck with it all" and an go off the deep end. Green light baby!!

Having grown up in a very religious and rule driven atmosphere I know more people my age who gave up on God when they came "of age" than should be reasonably expect. Because really, who can live with all these rules? And if that is the case why oh why does the church keep laying them down!?

If we can't trust people to be lead by the Spirit of God then why are we having them on our leadership teams I the first place? If we aren't teaching people young and old to be ruled by the Holy Spirit instead of regulations then how can we expect them to know how to act when outside of the church?

Why do Christians have such an awful reputation? 1) Because we expect others to live by the rules we are erroneously expected to live by and 2) Because we judge people instead of love people when they don't. Guilt and shame are not a byproduct of Christianity it is a byproduct of the rules of man.

I know many of you who have read this far are thinking, "Yes, but there have to be rules. A lot of rules we have for good reasons." Yes, and I'm sure the Pharisees and Sadducees felt very strongly about the reasons behind their rules as well. You know the only rules Christ gave us? To Love God and love your neighbor. Period.

I'm sorry to be so harsh on this subject, and no, I'm not saying we should all run around like banshees, we need to listen to and follow the voice of God. In the Bible the word for sin (or transgression) has nothing to do with a set of dos and don'ts it means missing the mark. And f God's perfection is the mark, haven't we all missed it? That's why we need Christ! We need Christ to save us and the Holy Spirit to convict us. That's all.

"So I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. For the flesh desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the flesh. They are in conflict with each other, so that you are not to do whatever you want. But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law." Galatians 5: 16-18 (emphases added)

I know it is cheesy, but I have to believe that in Christ, the light is always green.

"But as surely as God is faithful, our message to you is not 'Yes' and 'No.' For the Son of God, Jesus Christ, who was preached among you by us—by me and Silas and Timothy—was not 'Yes' and 'No,' but in him it has always been 'Yes.' For no matter how many promises God has made, they are 'Yes' in Christ. And so through him the 'Amen' is spoken by us to the glory of God." 2 Corinthians 1:18-20